HOW TO AVOID STUPID GUYS in the Chatroom?

You are here to have fun or gain friends no matter how noble your purpose is. But most gay people are indeed rude (MGA BAKLA NA NGA MASASAMA PA UGALI) and so stupid and unprofessional (PROBABLY THEY AREN'T) to fool you after trading your hidden pics.

DON'T DEAL WITH THE GUY IF...

1. They ask for your facepics yet they don't show anything on their profile. Don't be fooled by this tactic.

2. NO FACEPIC NO REPLY! BAKIT??? UBOD KA BA NG GANDA? THERE ARE SO MANY POSERS REMEMBER! LOL. MAG ISIP KA NAMAN NG IBANG WORDS KASAWA NA LINYANG YAN EH HAYS...

3. They put requirements for their sexual or statistical preferences yet you don't have those qualities they are seeking. You will be dumped anyway, right away or ignored.

4. They sent you a message which is short or oneliner such as: sex? facepic? fuck me? fuck kita? Tarantado ang tao pag ganyan agad. No sensitivities whatsoever.

5. They declare themselves as TOP yet they show only their buttpics and funny pictures just to catch your attention. BAKLANG MAPAGPANGGAP ANG TAWAG DIYAN =)

6. They are so over confident declaring themselves as very handsome yet can't show any proof. Remember that they look for "good guys" kuno yet, iisahan ka lang sa trading ng pics. Kupal di ba?

7. They wrote senseless things in their profiles, obviously trying hard to impress people. And his English? Heavens! Ang sarap mag tumbling after reading them =)

8. They talk about money for sex, escort or massage services unless you shop for guys like them. MOST people like them can't be trusted for your valuables. Remember... they capitalize on their face and body only or on some stupid small intelligence and thus don't be lured by Mr. Nice Guy attitude during your chat or end yourself as a victim!

9. The guy posts all of his email messages from his "fans" just to build up his profile. Certainly, that guy is so INSECURE of HIMSELF psychologically speaking.

10. They publish their contact numbers at once on their shout outs or profiles. These kind of people just collect or have nothing to do better with their lives (jobless or ugly perhaps ha ha) . Thank God for text unlimited they can afford to bug you 24 hours! Disturbing you in your sleep or wee hours in the morning. You collect as well? Then experience tons of WHO U? on your texts.... waste of time and money isn't it? The messenger is fine to post but...you won't usually remember people adding you that would end up in repeated Who's this??? Where You got my YM, MSN or SKYPE???

11. They have nicks that are lewd (if you know that word meaning =) ) yet, they want friends only kuno. So Stupid!

12. They post finding their Mr. Rights or Relationship status DAW. Eh sila pala hindi matino. =) May standards daw kasi sila. Shit na standards yan! =) Gusto ng discreet at gwapo eh anak ng puta mukha naman siyang TIKLING na naghiram lang ng mukha. nagkadibdib lng ng konti gym fit na sya HAHA. Kumusta naman ang timbang nya syempre 110 lbs. pa rin haha.

13. They claim having L or XXL dicks sizes. Golly, with the THOUSANDS (I stopped counting lols) of dicks I've tried from various nationalities of the world. With just one look on the picture I know how long it can go further. It's a rarity to see and touch a 9 inch cock in the Philippines. Get your ruler and measure that again in full erection!

14. They post shout-outs and preferences on their profile looking for THE BIG MR. RIGHT and NICE GUY, etc. etc. Guys, just a word of advice... Don't make your profiles looking like a C.V. BELIEVE ME! When it comes to gay relationships, credential preferences don't matter, you may be a graduate of Harvard but you look like a LOSER OR a DUCKLING WHO'S PERENIALLY UGLY? YOU'RE A DOCTOR OR A LAWYER or write like a PhD? THEY DON'T MATTER! EVERYTHING STARTS WITH PHYSICAL ATTRACTION. NOBODY'S PERFECT REMEMBER THAT! IT IS VERY DIFFICULT ESTABLISHING A RELATIONSHIP STARTING WITH A CHEAP HOOK-UP, THE AIR OF DOUBT IS ALREADY PRESENTED. EITHER YOU OR YOUR FUCK BUD WOULD ALWAYS BE ON A LOOK OUT FOR A BETTER FACE, BODY and BRAINS. AND NOW YOU WONDER WHY YOUR RELATIONSHIPS FAIL??? IT SHOULD BE A MEETING OF THE MIND, BODY AND SOUL FOR YOU TO LAST. GO GET A PARTNER THAT WOULD SUIT YOUR MINIMAL TASTE and STOP DREAMING OF GETTING A HANDSOME GUY WITH A HUMONGOUS DICK YET POSSESSES A SHARK BRAIN. GO GET SOME COMMON SENSE AND LOOK AT YOURSELF FIRST!!!

LAST BUT NOT THE LEAST. KAYA NGA BAKLA TAYO EH, KAKAIBA TALAGA. MAY SASABLAY AT SASABLAY TALAGA SA MGA KILOS NATIN, PIPILANTIK AT PIPILANTIK ANG MGA DALIRI MO, KEKEMBOT AT KEKEMBOT KA NG DI MO ALAM, TITINGIN AT TITINGIN KA SA GWAPO PAG TRIP MO, LULUHOD AT LULUHOD KA SA BURAT NA GUSTO MO. LALAMBOT AT LALAMBOT ANG BOSES MO NG DI MO NAMAMALAYAN. KAYA TIGILAN AKO NG MGA NAG IINARTE DYAN. PAPUNTA PA LANG KAYO NAKAHILATA NA AKO!

HOW TO AVOID GAY CRIMES (Philippine Setting)

Yes. It's a reality. We sometimes love to take risks in every gay encounter. We love dark places. We hide in huge trees. We pursue cute guys in filthy restrooms. We even fantasize of being gang-raped. BUT, we only have one life to live.

Countless times I have read and heard of hidden gay crimes. Too shy to reveal, too shy to divulge their unforgettable nightmares with their friends and relatives. Can't think of reasons and ways to twist their shameful stories so they would end up as the victim and not the culprit for the incidents they never thought would happen and gain your friends respect and sympathy at the end of your story version.

Snakes can be found everywhere.

Here are tips again to safeguard yourself in case your libido is uncontrollable at times.

Movie House Cruising

Regardless you are in a nice mall or in a third run movie house where you can engulf several dicks. Always think of your wallet or valuable things. I have witnessed several horny guys in movie houses that after being sucked in the restroom or in the balcony and elsewhere are running like headless chickens searching for their wallets and cellphones, clamoring for some help from the security guards to no avail. Thus, if you are planning to shop for some cheap dicks in places like this, do not bring your wallet, just bring enough cash on your pocket or purse. NO BAGS OR POUCHES. AND, do not forget to bring an I.D. for your identification in case something worse happen to you, your dental records with your dentist is a big help BUT, is your dental record updated?

At Your Own House/Room

Yup. very convenient. BUT! Get rid of sharp objects in your room or plastic or nylon cords or anything that will cause asphyxiation for you in case you had sex with a serial killer or a drug addict planning to rob your place. You have a gun? Goodluck!

In Bath Houses

Survey the vicinity if you are a first timer. Check the lockers if your things are safe. Don't cruise with your valuables on your body.

At Parks and Dark Places

Lovely isn't it? Looks romantic but scary. How many times that gays love to cruise and mistakenly dealt with the wrong guy that after the quickie suddenly asks for your money by force? Poor gay goes home walletless, cellphoneless and sometimes lifeless. JUST DON'T! OK?

The Restrooms

Indeed! Your favorite place to savor the sights of wanking or urinating guys. Be mindful of the security people and secretly hidden CCTV cameras or your picture is published either in the newspaper or cheap tabloids with your NAME.

Got Arrested by the Police or Guards?

Calm down. THEY WILL ATTEMPT TO EXTORT YOU in exchange for your shameful activity. They will curse you, fool you, take picture of you and threaten you to be listed and reported. These authorities have gainful access and contacts with the cheap tabloids to sensationalize your homosexual acts. Vagrancy in the Philippines if I am not mistaken is PHP 200.00 only! That is the legal fine. Other than that call your lawyer.

The Callboys / Masseurs

That is their job and therefore they know the tricks of their trade than you do. They will really seduce you. Negotiate the right amount. Remember that you are perceived as having money and thus will ask for more after your sex bout. Don't allow yourself to follow them at their designated hotel or place. That is a snake pit for you. You are the one paying and therefore you are the BOSS.

Cam to Cam?

Gays really do not learn for the sake of lust. Why engage in cam to cam when you are about to be recorded? Why in the hell you gonna believe that your chat mate isn't recording you with your face happily wanking? Your images can still be caught by cellphones! There are so many free software in the net to capture your images. Don't get mad if your friends see your latest scandal. Only YOU yourself is to be blamed.

The Taxi / FX Ride

Countless crimes already caused by this kind of transport. You enjoy peeping at the crotch of your driver? You give the guy a signal to gag you after. A ride for your final destination.

Street Cruising

Feeling Victoria Secret model? Be sure you have wings to fly as well. A nocturnal gay cruiser usually invites a surefire crime or gay bashing. WALK FAST THEN.

The Orgy Parties

No matter how preselected and " recommended" the invited gay swingers are into O parties, physical abuses can be discreet. What is most dreadful are the Sexually Transmitted Diseases that you will contract from these strangers. You commit a CRIME TO YOURSELF, YOUR FAMILY and LOVED ONES. Think a thousand fold before joining or rather REGRET after ACQUIRING A DEADLY INCURABLE DISEASE. If you are highly active in sex, have your blood checked every 2 or 3 months.

Consider yourself enrolling in the Art of Self Defense. It is much better than possessing a good body with a slash on your throat! =)

THE WRONGNESS OF ENTERING INTO A RELATIONSHIP WITH A DISCREET GUY

The moment that you see a guy's profile declaring that NOBODY knows that he's gay and is wishing to try a relationship with another guy, you MUST take a deep breath especially if you really like him. OR JUST PLAINLY DOUBT HIS DECLARATION.

The Caveats and Pitfalls on falling for them:

1. Yes, they are also men that would mean Polygamy is an established fact as a character. Like you, they want many men as they can WITHOUT YOU KNOWING IT.

2. The moment they say YES to have you as their special guy, get ready for a TEMPORARY WHIRLWIND ROMANCE. If he's good looking and you aren't, that is a problem as well.

3. Be ready to be disappointed MOST OF THE TIME. A discreet guy FEARS A LOT of things, gatherings, parties, or even be introduced with your gayish friends. To be identified as gay and seen with another gay is a BIG NO NO for them.

4. If he stays with you because you are good in bed, that would also be TEMPORARY. He would always try other men that is so much better and more discreet than you. At the moment he steps out of your door, don't wish he will come back as often as he could.

5. When you start falling for him and you start to feel really CRAZY about him that would mean texting or calling him all day. He will not like that for long. That would be the start for fights between the two of you and eventually GOODBYE.

6. USUALLY, he will declare that his family doesn't know anything about his gender preferences or sexual bouts and promiscuities. BELIEVE ME, parents and siblings have an idea about his gender already, they just DON'T TALK ABOUT IT! Specially MOTHERS, the instincts of our mothers rarely fails and would still love you no matter what.

7. If he doesn't reply to your texts or answering your phonecalls? Its either:


a. he is sucking or being sucked by another guy
b. he is with his family and friends
c. he is sick? keep on wishing he's telling you the truth
d. he's busy. (kuno) (nyeta!)

8. The whole world knows he's gay EXCEPT HIM! hahahaha

It is indeed difficult having them. Think a hundred times before falling with these kind of guys. You wouldn't get the kind of affection that you need or deserve most of the time. They wouldn't be proud in public beeing SEEN with you. Most of the time you two are locked inside your rooms ALL THE TIME. Then after that, start acting again as if you wouldn't sway your hips accidentally.

So expect as well that your boyfriend will disappear like Superman if he sees you with some THAT IS SO BAKLA and MAS BAKLA than you do.

Is HE THE RIGHT GUY TO LOVE Indeed?

Everyone of us wanted to be loved, there is no doubt about that...

I myself was into 45 relationships already. One week, 2 weeks, 1 month, 2 months to 7 months to 4 years...

How do you gauge if you are into a "serious relationship" already?

Here are some indicators that will help you, basing it from my experiences...

1. He can't get out of your mind every minute. But be careful... this could be an indication of lust only! Especially if you were able to see him on cam or looked at his yummy videos. This can fool YOU!

2. You "might" like the guy already, since you have been chatting for 5 hours or more on the first day you've chatted. This only proves that he's also interested with you.

3. He made himself invisible to his other chatmates (though you can't be so sure he did this just for you) He He He.

4. You two started talking about yourselves and your family, your ambitions and desired character of a would be partner.

5. You set a day for the two of you to meet. Whether to have sex or a cup of coffee.

6. You start exchanging messages on your cell phones non-stop daily.

7. "I Love You"... is suddenly sent to you and vice versa. But then again...true love takes time.

8. Your first day of sex was heavenly, and wouldn't want to separate on that evening as much as possible.

9. If gazing at the eyes of your partner was really different and you see Cloud 9, it must have been love...

10. You can't afford not to embrace or kiss your partner all the time and vice versa.

11. Guy you've met suddenly gave you something on your first day, probably his treasured thing he was wearing or any kind of surprise.

12. Both of you decided to delete or cancel your account in all of the gay sites you 2 are members. AGAIN... you can easily create a bogus membership anyway, anyday. Ha Ha.

13. TRUST is the key word. Though at present times, this is really tough, where access to all temptations are scattered. A potential sexmate is just a message or phone call away. Your guy is attractive? Expect that his mobile phone will keep on ringing or beeping.

14. RESPECT and LOVE YOURSELF! Even though right from the very start that entering into a relationship with gays can be very perilous. You have to keep your composure to love yourself still. As our elders tell us... Give love only 60% or 70% or worse 50%... Leave something for yourself. So it wouldn't hurt that much when it fails.

15. You two decided to live in together. Be careful. Living together hurts most. Curing your heartache is almost impossible. Again, TIME is the greatest healer of all.

16. You two started to introduce yourselves to your family and friends. This only means he's not ashamed of you but rather proud of you. If your partner can't do these 2 things of introducing you to either one of those... HE AIN'T THE RIGHT ONE FOR YOU! Sad to say...

17. His siblings or parents start to call you or ask you things about your partner. This shows that there is already some air of acceptance for the two of you.

18. BIG PLUS. If you were invited to go out with his family. In my experience, I had a lover whose sister consulted me all the time about her business and etc. etc. His mom talked to me in private to take good care of his son. Not to mention that my ex boyfriend had a girfriend at the same time when we were together. Surprisingly... his family chose me than the girlfriend. LOL.

19. Jealousy is a normal occurrence in any relationship. Without this, the spices for love is reduced. Rather, being jealous strengthens the two of you more as long as it's healthy.

20. Your guy and you, stopped looking at other guys. Do you see his eyes still roaming around and flirting at your back? DROP HIM! Don't waste your time.

21. You are dating at least once a week, or twice a month. This is still good. But constant communication is A MUST! If you don't receive any replies from him, don't panic! He might be sick or any untoward incident happened. Again.. open your mind and be very understanding. You will know anyway if he starts to lie with you. Keep your eyes open. Use your intuition if he's telling the truth or not.

22. You two always ask for permissions on your daily activities if the other wouldn't be available. You both know your schedules about work and others.

23. Both of your eyes sparkle everytime you see each other. You lose this magic one day... then you may start wondering

24. Both of you have nothing to hide. His cell phone is turned off or in silent mode??? Hmm...

25. When both of you start checking your personal things (used undies, cell phone messages or logged calls, his bed sheets and pillows for some stains or smells unusual to you), you may start to cry.

26. He has the TIME to be spent with you and YOU are his PRIORITY most of the time.

27. Money should not be an issue. Spending should flow naturally without force. Though if money is the one working for the both of you to stay? IT IS NOT LOVE!!! Thus... it is ideal that you find a partner who has a source of income like you. If only one has the financial power, then love is being bought for confidence and sexual company ONLY.

Same sex relationship is triple the intensity than that of the heterosexuals. You don't commit yourself if you are not indeed READY!

You might be ready but your desired partner isn't. Obviously, he isn't the right one for you.

The truth is... you have set your own standards for your would be lovers but most often than not, this is not being strictly followed.

What standards??? If you seek for a partner that has the same credentials as you do or looks that you have. Call yourself lucky when you find one. REAL LOVE surpasses all standards. It's the MAGIC that you feel. Our hearts don't think. They ONLY FEEL.

My successful relationships were mostly with the guys below my standards. If only I could turn back the time to have them again.

When there's a Beginning there is absolutely an END to everything...

So treasure your moments while you two have each other.

You may start playing Roxette's... It Must Have Been Love... =)

HOW TO BE ASSURED THAT UR CHATMATE IS THE REAL ONE?

This blog of mine is somewhat a follow-up article on Determining pic on profile is indeed HIS

The Philippine Setting

I received a lot of feedbacks from my chatmates and friends about meet-ups that end up usually as a dismal failure. Believe it or not you just have to use your plain common sense not necessarily having an IQ of 140. Just be a keen observant and be WISE.

THE POSERS

1. FINE, you are extremely horny at the moment you wanna meet up with someone coz you saw a picture so dashing with a big tool on his profile. BEWARE! Usually, people copypasting pictures from the net of handsome guys AREN'T THEM! They're just attention seekers to fool you. You should see the same pictures of handsome guys in other sites and LifeOUT profiles as well. Observe the sizes of the pictures when zoomed individually, study the environment. Or you might be looking at another version of Mona Lisa. That is if you wanna be fooled.

You realized LATE that you just wasted hundreds of money in exchanging text messages and phone calls with your dream guy not meeting you up. If you wanna determine the pic on profile is indeed his, just read my previous article about this.

2. Serious people spend time FIRST chatting, getting to know each other and communicating before the FUN DAY. This is to assure yourself that indeed you are talking and negotiating with the right person. Though in some very rare cases, It'll be a jackpot if the eyeball set up really matches the one you see on profile. The webcam is a big plus.

3. Handsome and beautiful people USUALLY prefer meeting up with the same kind. So... if you dont have THAT LOOK like them. Forget it. You are just wasting your time, money and effort. UNLESS he has a penchant for oddities.

THE RIPPLED MUSCULAR GUY

Unfortunately, I have met and do have some friends who are screaming fags whenever they are with their closest friends, possessing rippled muscles, and they are lovable as well. Surprisingly, they themselves admitted they have to fool the other gymbots as well. Goodluck if you hate people that misleads you. And one more thing, Gays had learned to develop themselves. They are aware that they don't have the necessary pretty faces to gain self confidence and sex partners and therefore the LAST RESORT is to beautify their bodies. And lastly, in this field of homosexuality, a PRETTY FACE IS STILL THE MOST DESIRABLE.

THE RETOUCHED PICTURE

Seeing a picture so perfect? No blemishes at all? Thanks to paint and adobe photo shop. DO NOT expect your eyeball to look the same way in person.

THE PROFILE STATISTICS

Here's the guy so goodlooking on a 6 foot frame but voila! The height on profile is 5'4 or 4'0. Go to the next profile then.

THE FEMME LOOK

If you aren't for girly gays as your preferred sexual partner, obviously you are not their targetted market. Period. To each his own philosophy.

HOW TO DETERMINE PIC ON PROFILE IS INDEED HIS

Funny but true. Unless you have met the guy in person and communicated with him several times.

How to trace?

1. Check the physical environment of the pictures, the consistency of the background will help you.

2. Familiarize yourself in other gay sites, if you see same pictures but with different nicks or IDs, it could be fake. (Guys pose using other guys' pics to attract attention but wouldn't meet since they aren't the real one and would say a million excuses not to meet you)

3. Use your mental judgment or just thank the guy for that wonderful picture that sent you thousands of orgasmic activities.

4. Check the physical characteristics of the face with the body. Do they coordinate?

5. Check the skin color. Though some white complexioned guys may have dark dicks with the indication that it's either overused or too much melanin pigment present.

6. Familiarize yourself with Adobe Photoshop, CS, Paint software etc. etc. that alters a photograph. Unless the guy has the perfect Phoenician features.

7. Test your geography skills. Is that kind of creature present in that continent? Or there might be a new Survivor game show that is ongoing.

8. If it's consistently beheaded, surely, the guy ain't ready to go out of the closet due to family, social, and peer factors. Leave the guy his prerogative.

9. Check the consistency of the profile they wrote, do they match? Spot the english grammar or the language they used in writing. Otherwise, that guy is only gifted with the face and the body minus the intellect of a professional. Thank him still.

10. Study the environment of the picture. Does it match with their claims (cars, home or room furnishings, the schools, universities or companies they are/were associated with or visited places, income status in the society) on their profile?

11. When you see several pictures claiming theirs and obviously seeing various lengths, sizes, colors, crotch sizes, and skin tones. Just say hallelujah to yourself.

12. And lastly, if the profile contains only their reproductive organs, thank them still, hoping that their faces don't look that way. =)

LOOKING FOR A BI-DISCREET GUY? HERE ARE THE TIPS…

Remember that these are the kind of guys who love staying inside their pink closets. Due to family, peer, social or work related reasons and pressures, they maintain their identities like OO7. Please don’t forget as well that they REALLY HATE effeminates or screaming fags. Unless they are referring to themselves as being “the girl” for that sexual bout.

Fifteen or twenty years ago, I seldom see obviously gay people going to the gym. The gym has been the mothership for weightlifters and aspiring Mr. Muscleman contestants. In fact, in those previous years I’ve mentioned, I rarely hear the word tops or bottoms or versas. Certainly, every gay man has his own experience to share during his “re-awakening” period.

Here are the tips that the gay man of the century had learned so as not to be maligned or receive rejections from their eyeballs:

DON’T…

1. Wear shoulder bags. No matter the brand or how metrosexual you can be, this is still a big turn-off for most discreet guys.

2. Wear shocking colors. Would you like to see a sex eyeball in tangerine, fucshia, apple green or electric blue?

3. Put make-up. Would you like to be crowned as the new Foundation Day Queen?

4. Wear a ladies perfume or a cheap cologne. Better yet, your natural masculine scent is a big turn-on. The scent of your roll-on is enough to multiply the pheromones of your armpits.

5. Pretend that your voice is manly. The conversation will come up for sure. The high pitch quality is uncontrollable if that’s the natural you. But what the heck! David Beckham has that icky voice but is so gorgeous.

6. Look so neat, that you just stepped out of a salon unless you are indeed a celebrity or a ramp model coming from a photo shoot.

7. Appear to be so sexually-inclined, so malicious that you wanna suck the whole person at the moment of meeting-up.

8. Exaggerate your moves. Every sway of your hips and fingers cannot deny your femininity.

9. Over-impress the guy that you start praising him to high-heavens during the first meet-up. Get some decency and self-respect no matter how attractive the guy is than you.

10. Lure the guy with the money on your wallet. Would you like to be held-up?

11. Volunteer to pay all of the bills, unless you picked up the guy from the slum areas. You are just sending the signal to the guy that you aren’t beautiful as well and your money will just buy his company.

12. Forget to pray that you will be safe into that risky encounter. Always bring with you some identification cards for some untoward incidents.

13. Forget to protect yourself by bringing some lube or rubber. You don’t want your family and friends to learn that you had some anal lacerations.

14. Dream that the guy will still contact you after that sex eyeball. He’s got other asses to explore.

15. Over react if you see some cockroaches, lizards, spiders or rats running. These creatures are effective in tracing a guy’s gayness.

16. Discuss things that might bore your partner, stories about your EXs and past experiences unless he asks for it.

17. Discuss about the arts or gallery or cultural shows and ballet performances. They might suspect you as the prima ballerina.

18. Invite your partner to your house when your room is sprinkled with freesias, candles, vases and feminine colors of your curtains. Unless, he is of the same interests.

19. Forget… that a masculine room is devoid of antiques, floral lampshades, shawls, flowers, candles, tightly-neat room. The girly magazine is a plus not necessarily gay mags.

20. Wear girly undies unless there was a role-play scheduled.

21. Wear too much accessories. Simplicity is preferred. The more accessories you wear be it on your ears or fingers and wrists the more “gayish” you appear. A real discreet guy is contented with his masculine wristwatch, no fancy colors or styles, an authentic Swiss alarm chronograph is a big turn-on. Those fancy “de-palito” / FAKE watches from the street vendors or Divisoria simply shows your “ka-cheapan” and “TH / trying hard” attitude. You might as well not wear ANYTHING!

22. Wear pastel or loud colored belts most specially WHITE COLOR! What a disaster!

These are just some of the things that you need to check for yourself and the list might go on and on and you may suggest some more by adding your comments and suggestions.