So You Think You're Ready for A Relationship?

I see a lot of gay guys wishing to have their special someones, some are even desperate posting their messengers and contact numbers on their profiles for an easy reach. What they are aren't aware of and realize are their safety and security nor wasting hundreds or thousands of money replying even to some prank trippers only.

While I understand that they wanted to feel to be so special and loved by someone. They are willing to gamble using their hard earned money for some senseless guys thus, ending to some added shame and disrespect for one's self more. Making them feel that they're the ugliest duck in this world.

How and where do we search the good guys then?

Before I answer this question, I want you to make a reflection of yourself.

Are you indeed ready?

Do you have what it takes to be a good lover?

What is your purpose of finding someone to love?

Or are you just looking for some temporary love? Worse, a sexual love only!

You can find in the net a lot of tips how to find lovers or partners. Others can be so ideal and believable. We even think that it's easier said than done. Some are even wishing for some recommendations for ideal partners. It could work for some but not for all.

So called standards can vary from one person to another.

Charles Darwin even theorized the principles of attraction. The survival of the fittest being is included in finding your would be partner. This might be complicated to some depending on your educational attainment and understanding.

Gay teens are mostly on the discovery stage. They thought that saying I Love You is that easy after a night of terrific sex. Only to find out later that his "partner" is fucking someone else.

Middle-aged men are not spared from these sad experiences. I can't blame some people why they don't believe in gay relationships anymore after dozens of heart aches and emotional breakdowns.

Is this the reason why our elders and experts tell us that gay happiness is only good when you're young and still beautiful? That our beautiful bodies and faces will soon fade and overtaken by the younger ones someday? That the time will come that you will use your money to buy some sex? What a bleak, dark and sad future for gays isn't it?

Answers to these questions can be very psychological nor philosophical that an average mind cannot fathom indeed.

1. Prepare yourself first.

Once you've reached your maturity nor done from playing around, I think it's time for you to make a self-reflection.

Look at the mirror. Are you still attractive? Do a lot of guys look at you still? If they take a second look at you then pray that you don't have a dirt on your face only. Which kind or level of people your physical beauty will attract most?

Don't dream of acquiring a very handsome guy if you aren't! Though this is possible if you have the money but then again, YOU ARE ONLY FOOLING YOURSELF FOR THE NTH TIME!

FACT. Usually, a guy who's lesser handsome than you will stare at you. Isn't it that you do that as well with guys prettier than you?

ANOTHER FACT. We should know if we are still pretty or not anymore. Don't believe your mom telling you that you still look good when the guys in public or elsewhere start to ignore you.

Solution? Take good care of yourself. Stop those bad habits. Smoking makes you look older same thing with alcohol that makes your skin appear dry.

Remember that attractions start with physical outlooks.

Be healthy and wise.

2. Look at your closet and dresser.

Do you have what it takes to be noticed? Are you still wearing the right kind of clothes like when you're younger? Or are they already a passe'?

Ask for second opinions from your friends. You think what you're wearing may not be as good anymore like you've thought of.

As we age, our tastes for fashion must adjust as well. You don't want to be tagged as a fashion victim right?

Wrinkles would definitely come. When you start smiling no matter how beautiful your teeth are can be a gruesome sight for most gay guys. That you are indeed just a thing of the past.

3. Get ready to accept guys/things as they are.

If you found someone that is so unstable emotionally nor a very active gay guy like you do, try creating a room for some patience and trust. You'll never know that you're the right one for him nor the kind of guy that he'd been waiting for so many years. Every guy you meet can be compared to a gift box filled with some surprises once you get to know him more.

to be continued....

Is There Such A Thing As A Bi/Gay Late Bloomer?

You think you're a man,
You are only a boy.
You think you're a man
You are only a toy.
You think you're a man
But you just couldn't see
You weren't man enough to satisfy me.

The Vaselines



Definition

A late bloomer is a person whose talents or capabilities are slow to develop. The term is used metaphorically to describe a child or adolescent who develops more slowly than others in their age group, but eventually catches up and in some cases overtakes their peers, or an adult whose talent or genius in a particular field only appears later in life than is normal - in some cases only in old age.

Let's try altering the definition making it gay-related. =)

A gay late bloomer is a person whose talents or capabilities are slow to develop in matters of homosexual attraction, caused by pressures from social peers, family orientation, professional reasons, religious involvement, sexual and cultural innuendos, and etc.

The following are the typical character traits of a gay late bloomer:

1. A guy who longed for several years touching another man's dick.

2. A guy who's contented by looking at his neighbor's dong in a urinal.

3. He thought that his high school English essay of raising his own family, fuck a girl or raise his own children was put to waste is only a big fat lie to himself.

4. A guy who was sexually abused in his grade school years by the same gender and still couldn't forget that it wasn't just a trauma but a contributing factor as well for being gay eventually.

5. A guy who felt something different whenever he sees a naked guy in a magazine or in the environment.

6. A guy whose eyes are more focused on a guy's dick than staring at a girl's pussy in a porn film.

7. A guy who's been denying for eons of years that he's not gay and will never ever be.

8. A guy who's homophobic and eludes his way from screaming fags and transvestites or transexuals.

9. A guy who married a woman nor raised his own children but suddenly met a guy and changed his sexual orientation totally.

10. A guy who gets furiously mad when teased as a faggot.

11. A guy who confided and realized one day that he's different.

12. A guy who gives you a million excuses by not partaking into cultural endeavors, yet artistically inclined and is very talented.

13. A guy who dated another guy with some private intimacy.

14. Suddenly realized that he can dance with the music of Cher or Lady Gaga.

15. You visualize from time to time if your favorite actor looks great when naked.

16. Sometimes fantasizes that you are Wonder Woman nor as sexy as Poison Ivy.

17. He's 30 years old and above already and still single? (though this age bracket may still vary)

18. You are vain. Cosmetically.

19. You know by heart the top designer brands and loves them.

20. You got curious about ManJam, Planet Romeo or Gay.com.

A late blooming adult is a person who does not discover their talents and abilities until later than normally expected. In certain cases retirement may lead to this discovery.

There are many theories of the way in which people develop proposed by authorities such as Urie Bronfenbrenner, Jerome Bruner, Erik Erikson, Jerome Kagan, Lawrence Kohlberg, Jean Piaget and Lev Vygotsky.

These may be referring to late bloomers for heterosexuals, but the hounding questions are...

What makes a heterosexual being gay eventually?

What are the causes or factors for being a homosexual?

My answer to this...

What are the causes and factors for being a heterosexual???

You don't get it?

I don't as well. =)

The Lures and Downsides of Threesomes and Orgies (Philippine Setting)

When a gay guy reaches his maturity in matters of sexcapades, invitations such as these makes him reflect a lot more, if he will let himself succumb nor feel weak to these kind of temptations.

The thought of engaging in a multitude of moaning men around you is just a terrific sight and makes our senses both external and internal tumble in excitement to join.

The following scenes are expected realities that happens in threesomes and orgies:

1. Do expect that in threesomes and orgies you will meet guys with body odors.

If you are VERY particular about smells -- the sulfuric breath of a gay swinger, the stinking armpit or anus, then a group sex is not for you. The stinking smells and exchange of saliva among mouths and dicks are expected.

2. Do expect that a participant in a group sex will surely be choosy. Most especially if you're not possessing a pretty face or a delicious body.

Don't feel bad if a guy suddenly rejects you. Just think that you're still lucky because you were invited. LOL. Just enjoy the sight then and be contented in jacking yourself off. LOL.

3. Do be careful of your valuables. Not all organizers of orgies are particular with safety.

BE MINDFUL that some gay guys REALLY ORGANIZE CRIMES or invite you just to be robbed. Since your flesh is weak, you end yourself as a victim by losing your valuables. SO THINK AGAIN!

4. High profile orgy organizers DO SCREEN participants.

They may involve gay actors, elite members of the society and politicians that would pay the price for your safety and discretion as well. If you squeal... then there's a great chance of losing your reputation and life in return very soon! Don't get yourself get involved in a local gay mafia. HOW TO JOIN? YOU MUST BE EXTRAORDINARILY BEAUTIFUL TO BE RECRUITED!

5. Small time orgy organizers WILL REQUIRE MINIMUM CREDENTIALS:

a. No to Effeminates. Keep on wishing. LOL
b. Be average looking at least.
c. A huge cock is a plus factor.
d. A Minimal Joining Fee - for your drinks or room rentals and whatsoever.
e. Indicate your bed role. - Top, Bottom or Versa.

6. Expect that in a threesome, there is a usual loser.

You are left behind if you are less attractive or not  great in bed.

7. Don't believe that if a couple invites you claiming that the couple is just a couple. They may be long time partners in a relationship, who's just exploring things with you to remove their boredom TEMPORARILY. Try to sense some air of jealousy in this case. And be careful, because you might spark a fight between the two. LOL.

8. Protect yourself no matter how handsome and delicious the guys are. Gay guys who  HAS THE MONEY and LOOKS ARE THE USUAL DISEASE CARRIERS since they have the ways and means most of the time.

Be health conscious. How many guys I've learned that they contracted those deadly diseases through orgies from both known and unknown guys??? From the prominent men in the society and elite gay circles. But of course, they could afford to travel around the world among the best gay capitals and bath houses of the world and ready to transfer their weird microorganisms with you. You can't monitor who transferred you the disease. Everyone fucked you. You sucked all of them. Now you regret after???

Go ahead guys, try it ONCE or NEVER after reading this article of mine. CURIOSITY USUALLY KILLS THE CAT. =)

SELF-DISCIPLINE and SELF-CONTROL is the ultimate key and wisdom for you here.

The Perils of Being Bottom

Admit it or not. We are gays! lolz Call yourself STRAIGHT, BI, TRIPPER and fuckin' other branding yourself excuses. We even fantasize as girls most of the time than you least expect it. Whether you wanna borrow discretely the make up of your sister or your mom or fit their brassieres or skirts and blouses or accessories when they are not around! And thus we even fantasize nor dream of being fucked by a real acting MAN once in a while.

How many tops I have met confiding with me that they are willing to be bottoms for their right kind of guy? Pure tops claiming they haven't been fucked EVER SINCE! Yet, they will ask you to fuck them since they like you on your first meet up. =)

Tops claiming that they are PURE TOPS. Yet their anuses have been penetrated 3/4 at least thus painful and decided to be top lifelong instead.

Tops claiming the feel like a real man since they are the ones fucking fags and still maintains their confusion being tagged as gay. I AM TOP! But I wear make up! And I do girlie house chores.

We love experiments in sex. If we are in love, some tops become versas since they are in with love their partners and thus a pure top is now a rara avis. Hope that they are not lying to you!

G-Spot as experts claim are only found in girls. Men do get satisfied once their prostate gland is touched.

The prostate is a compound tubuloalveolar exocrine gland of the male reproductive system in most mammals.

The prostate differs considerably among species anatomically, chemically, and physiologically.

The prostate gland has four distinct glandular regions, two of which arise from different segments of the prostatic urethra.

During male orgasm, sperm is transmitted from the ductus deferens into the male urethra via the ejaculatory ducts, which lie within the prostate gland.

Some men are able to achieve orgasm solely through stimulation of the prostate gland, such as prostate massage or receptive anal intercourse.

So... a good fuck by your top can make your sexual intercourse heavenly. Unfortunately, most tops are selfish, fucking you rough thinking only of themselves to release their orgasm. Poor bottom cries in pain and profusely bleeding.

The Risks of Being Bottom:

1. You are the receptor and thus you receive everything a top transfers to you. Be it viruses, bacteria, or weird microorganisms that will make you sick.

2. From being a receptor, you now become a host harboring those microorganisms. Every top that enters your bowels is surely infected if not protected by some rubber. The gonorrhea bacteria (or any one-celled organism) finds the warm and damp environment of the rectum as their most suitable place to multiply.

3. If you are a virgin from being fucked. Expect profuse bleeding that can last from days to weeks if not treated. It is horrifying to see your toilet bowl with blood, appearing that you have ingested liters of merthiolate or mercurochrome!

4. Expect that your anus will swell for days. If you weren't well-lubed expect that the bacteria will harbor the walls of your rectum starting from your anus. Any decomposing blood cell or organism will attract microorganisms to linger in your body.

5. Depending on the roughness of the fuck, the trouble can climb into your large intestines. Isn't it that the rectum is just an extension of the large intestine?

6. You may suffer from anal itch from time to time. An indication either that your wound from a fresh fuck is healing or worsening!

7. The lining of the rectal wall is VERY THIN that is seating next to your tiny blood vessels. Any slight fissure created by a rough and hard fuck will surely welcome any harmful microorganism direct into your bloodstream!

Your Weapons or Arsenals as bottom:

1. Condoms and I mean a lot! not just one.

2. First or second generation of antibiotics such as amoxycillins. But consult your doctors first if you are safe to take them or it will cause you allergic reactions!

3. Water-based lubricants so it wont tear your condoms. Some rubbers can withstand water-based lotions and lubes but is not a 100% assurance for safe sex still.

3. Enemas - Clean your rectum people, your feces has bacteria that can infect your top as well.

4. Don't fuck if you're not prepared.

5. Don't eat much, estimate the time of arrival of your top to avoid shame or leaving something on the shaft or dick head of your top. So abstain from eating if you can before that fuck.

6. A sexy underwear stimulates your top more. =)

7. When in doubt of your top. DON'T FUCK. Investigate more about him!

8. Multiply your efforts to cleanse your bowels IMMEDIATELY AFTER A FUCK, most specially if the SEMEN of your UNIDENTIFIED PARTNER was LEFT INSIDE YOU. Pray that he's not infected with the deadly STDs.  But then again, you forgot to use your largest sex organ which is your BRAIN by not protecting yourself.

9. Have your blood screened immediately by a laboratory if you suspect yourself having fevers after a few days from that consistent and deadly fuck from a horny and stranger top.

10. Pray that you will refrain from being susceptible and lessen your libido as a power bottom.

A FEW MINUTES OF THRILL CAN LEAD TO A REGRET OF A LIFETIME.

PRACTICE SAFE SEX everyone, Either your are a top or a bottom.

Why You Need (more) Money If You Decide To Be Gay

I had observed a lot of gay guys in every corner of this world. Majority of them are discriminating, specially with those who can't afford lavish lifestyles or even buy an expensive beer. I made myself think and reflect at the same time... What's the difference? All dicks taste the same anyway!

Others can pretend and act they have money, but ONLY FOR A SHORT TIME!

Why need more money then? Money isn't everything,is it?

You need money to support the following:

1. Your Nightlife - Where else can you express or hide yourself best but at night? can you dig to stand in a bar or club not ordering a drink? If your looks are so dashing, that wouldn't be a problem since a lot of gay guys will hunt you or offer you to buy ANYTHING! Your first investment is to gain entrance first to the club.

2. Your Wardrobe - A Calvin Klein or an Armani outfit is sure fire eye popper for discriminating gay guys. Others will just show designer underwear to call your attention regardless of shirt brand or jeans they wear. That is still a plus. Just make sure you are wearing an authentic brand or you get the ire of the discriminating gay bourgeoisie. Be careful of your color choices as well and don't end yourself tagged as a fashion victim.

3. Your Brand of Drink - Are you going to drink a beer or a wine? You know Samuel Adams Utopias or a Vielle Bon Secours? These beers sell for at least $1,000 per bottle. French wines like Dom. Romane Conti cost at $1,540 per bottle.

You should take note that the wine market has many intermediaries that have a direct effect on prices. Importers, wholesalers and retailers are all out to make a profit, so prices may vary depending on the level at which you get involved. Also, auctions often get out of hand and may entail heavier prices.

Expensive? Yes they are, but when you are seen holding these luxury bottles, the best and the finest men approach you lolz.

4. Your Shopping List - Undies is just one thing, Buy something where you look great and in great shape. I have learned sometime that regardless of the brand you wear what matters most is the FIT! You may be wearing a leather upper that is so PRADA but you can't handle it anyway lolz. Wear something you are comfortable and at ease. Don't wear a brand if you don't feel like it. If you look good in a plain tee and some pair of old jeans. Go wear it! It's the bulge that matters lolz.

5. Your Scent - We all know that this depends on our skin chemistry. A D&G or a Chanel smells great with some but not for everybody. You feel good in a baby's cologne? Then wear it =) Just a reminder, don't soak yourself like a cotton with your perfume. Anything excessive is irritating to the nose.

6. Your Jewelry - If you ask me? I don't encourage you to wear them if you are just meeting a stranger or a guy from some chat room. Wear them only on a formal occasion. A branded Swiss chronograph is enough to show the discriminating taste you have.

7. your Lifestyle - This matters. Every choice you make reflects your culture and upbringing. The food you eat, the mall you choose, the hotel you prefer, the words you say, the foreign words you utter, your travel destination, the sports club membership that you own.

Aren't gay guys known to be discriminating? Since most are known to be fashionistas and trendsetters. What do we do with the middle-income gay guys? Or worse the penniless gay guys?

Trust me. it only takes a good conversation for some hook up. Be confident but not over. Show your talent, wit and some intelligence. Say the right words. who knows you'll spend a night with your dream guy without lifting a penny from your fingers. You will strip anyway after. ;-)

Gay Realities 101

Being tagged or identified as gay is still horrible and unacceptable to some. The political correctness in defining a "gay" man can raise the eyebrows of most bisexuals not allowing themselves to be tagged as GAY.

Our elders tell us...

1. Do you realize that being gay will lead to you to melancholy eventually?

2. Are you ready to grow old being single as a dirty old gay?

3. Do you risk yourself of acquiring sexually transmitted diseases since the perception of being gay is equals to multiple sex partners?

4. Aren't you afraid of growing old alone in your death bed?

5. Yes you can a fool a woman that you're not gay since you act manly. But is that the real you?

6. Aren't you scared that even though you are respected in your own endeavor but still you are called gay?

7. When will you stop sneaking in my dresser to borrow my make-up or my accessories or worse even my underwear?

8. When will you stop drooling at those straight guys passing by?

9. If you choose being gay for the rest of your life then get ready to be sad most of the time!

10. The happiness that you have right now is alright because you are still young. What if you grow old and lose your beauty?

11. Are you ready to face the grilling questions of your Dad, your friends and relatives?

12. You see your straight friends raising their own families and are you contented of being a godfather most of the time?

13. Are you sick?

14. You think your current boyfriend wont leave you for another man?

15. Why did you become gay? Your father's generation is a generation of studs, soldiers and servicemen.

16. Why do I see most of the time guys visiting you in your apartment and your door is always locked?

17. Why don't I get to see you along with girls locked in your room?

18. When are those boys going to stop calling you?

19. How come I don't see you entangled with a girl?

20. Why do you always come home late having a manly powdery scent?

21. I think the underwear I found under your bed is not yours!

22. How come I found Playgirl magazines in your closet?

23. What is that KY/Petroleum jelly for?

24. How come that whenever we are together you take much of your time inside a men's room?

25. What are those higher generation antibiotics doing in your drawer?

26. How come that your room looks so feminine?

27. Why does the wall paper of your desktop shows muscled men in skimpy undies?

28. Who's that handsome guy I saw you with an hour ago?

29. Why are you visiting the gym daily?

30. Are you GAY??? WTF!!!

Questions like these are indeed traumatic to most of us. Sometimes when we are alone after a sex bout, we are back into a reality of sadness. An emptiness starts to hound us. We ask ourselves sometimes... why we became like this? Why am I different?

We may be successful in our fields but others just can't simply FULLY ACCEPT the way we are.

So what do we do then? Get busy? For how long? Adopt a child? Is that the solution? Marry a girl? Just make sure you fuck her most of the time and not some guy in your neighborhood. Become a priest? Or join some religious congregation? what for? Be religious enough? I hope so.

We can't escape our situation just like that.

So how do we end this?

Your answer is as good as mine.

Understanding and Knowing Your Stalker

We hear this word from time to time. We even crack jokes among our friends. But stalking someone can cause a serious problem to a person's privacy and can lead you to jail. Let's take a look at the definition first:

The term "stalking" is more commonly used to describe specific kinds of behavior directed at a particular person, such as harassing or threatening another person. But the variety of specific strategies employed and behaviors displayed by stalkers are limited only by the creativity and ingenuity of the stalkers themselves. Suffice it to say, virtually any unwanted contact between a stalker and their victim which directly or indirectly communicates a threat or places the victim in fear can generally be referred to as stalking.

Fine. You could be the nicest and most trusting person here on earth. Your being "kind" suddenly brings you into trouble.

The following are the usual habits of a gay stalker, and you may classify yourself if you are one of them:

1. They will ask for your email addresses. They may start asking for your chat messengers and nicks but without you knowing they use that in Googling you.

2. They will take note of every word you say or type in the chat box. Crucial information such as your present employment, company information, school you graduated, your area of residence, provinces, and others.

3. They will ask for your contact numbers, be it cell phones, land line, office numbers.

4. They will ask for your face pictures, or ask you to show yourself on your web cam. Get ready to be recorded or saved.

5. They will bug you 24/7 once they get to know your crucial information.

6. They will try their best to do research about you, even call your friends, ex boy friend/lover family or relatives just to be with you to extract information.

7. They MIGHT steal some of your personal things (even your underwear) to satisfy their cravings for you.

8. They will walk along your path, trace everything even your personal interests and favorites.

9. They are willing to spend to lure you or court you no matter the price tag is.

10. They will remember EVERYTHING about you even your pet's name just to impress you.

Criminal Behind Bars wrote:

Is Stalking a New Phenomenon?

No -- the history of stalking behavior is as old as the history of human relationships. Stalking has always been with us -- what is new is that, until recently, it was never labeled as a separate and distinct class of deviant behavior. Prior to its common usage and its subsequent designation as a crime, stalking was referred to as harassment, annoyance or, in some cases, simply as domestic violence.

In the late 1980s and early 1990s, numerous high-profile cases involving celebrities began to catch the attention of the media and public policy leaders. Only then did such behavior begin to be described as "stalking."

Since then, stalking has become a common subject in the popular media. With the advent of blockbuster films -- such as Fatal Attraction, Cape Fear, and Sleeping with the Enemy -- and its coverage by the news media, "stalking" has become a household word.

Who Are Stalkers?

Demographically:

Stalking is a gender neutral crime, with both male and female perpetrators and victims. How-ever, most stalkers are men. Best statistics indicate that 75-80 percent (75-80%) of all stalking cases involve men stalking women. Most tend to fall into the young to middle-aged categories. Most have above-average intelligence. Stalkers come from every walk of life and every socio-economic background. Virtually anyone can be a stalker, just as anyone can be a stalking victim.

Psychological and Behavioral Profile of Stalkers:

Unfortunately, there is no single psychological or behavioral profile for stalkers. In fact, many experts believe that every stalker is different, making it very difficult not only to categorize their behavior, but doubly difficult to devise effective strategies to cope with such behavior.

Forensic psychologists, who study criminal behavior, are just beginning to examine the minds and motives of stalkers. These psychologists have identified two broad categories of stalkers and stalking behavior -- "Love Obsession" and "Simple Obsession."

Love Obsession Stalkers

This category is characterized by stalkers who develop a love obsession or fixation on another person with whom they have no personal relationship. The target may be only a casual acquaintance or even a complete stranger. This category represents about 20-25 percent (20-25%) of all stalking cases.

Stalkers who stalk celebrities and stars -- such as David Letterman, Jodie Foster, and Madonna -- fall into the category of love obsessionists; however, stalkers in this category also include those who develop fixations on regular, ordinary people -- including co-workers, their aerobics instructor, casual acquaintances or people they pass in the street.

The vast majority of love obsessional stalkers suffer from a mental disorder -- often schizophrenia or paranoia. Regardless of the specific disorder, nearly all display some delusional thought patterns and behaviors. Since most are unable to develop normal personal relationships through more conventional and socially acceptable means, they retreat to a life of fantasy relationships with persons they hardly know, if at all. They invent fictional stories -- complete with what is to them real-life scripts -- which cast their unwilling victims in the lead role as their own love interest. They then attempt to act out their fictional plots in the real world.

The woman who has stalked David Letterman for five years truly believes she is his wife. She has been discovered on Mr. Letterman's property numerous times, has been arrested driving his car and has even appeared at his residence with her own child in tow -- each time insisting that she is David Letterman's wife.

Love obsessional stalkers not only attempt to live out their fantasies, but expect their victims to play their assigned roles as well. They believe they can make the object of their affection love them. They desperately want to establish a positive personal relationship with their victim. When the victim refuses to follow the script or doesn't respond as the stalker hopes, they may attempt to force the victim to comply by use of threats and intimidation.

When threats and intimidation fail, some stalkers turn to violence. Some decide that if they cannot be a positive part of their victim's life, they will be part of their life in a negative way. Some even go so far as to murder their victims in a twisted attempt to romantically link themselves to their victim forever. This was the case with the man who shot and killed Rebecca Schaffer, the young actress and star of the television show My Sister Sam.

Simple Obsession Stalkers

This second category represents 70-80 percent (70-80%) of all stalking cases and is distinguished by the fact that some previous personal or romantic relationship existed between the stalker and the victim before the stalking behavior began.

Virtually all domestic violence cases involving stalking fall under this rubric, as do casual dating relationships (commonly referred to as Fatal Attraction cases, named after the popular movie by the same title).

While this kind of stalker may or may not have psychological disorders, all clearly have personality disorders. One forensic psychologist has attempted to identify some of the common personality traits and behavioral characteristics among this category of stalkers. Stalkers in this class are characterized as individuals who are:

    * Socially maladjusted and inept;
    * Emotionally immature;
    * Often subject to feelings of powerlessness;
    * Unable to succeed in relationships by socially-acceptable means;
    * Jealous, bordering on paranoid; and
    * Extremely insecure about themselves and suffering from low self-esteem.

The self-esteem of simple obsession stalkers is often closely tied to their relationship with their partner. In many cases, such stalkers bolster their own self-esteem by dominating and intimidating their mates. Exercising power over another gives them some sense of power in a world where they otherwise feel powerless. In extreme cases, such personalities attempt to control every aspect of their partner's life. This behavior pat-tern was vividly depicted in the major motion picture entitled Sleeping with the Enemy, where the antagonist turns to intimidation and violence as the means to control every aspect of his victim/wife's life.

Since the victim literally becomes the stalker's primary source of self-esteem, their greatest fear becomes the loss of this person. Their own self-worth is so closely tied to the victim that when they are deprived of that person, they may feel that their own life is without worth.

It is exactly this dynamic that makes simple obsession stalkers so dangerous. In the most acute cases, such stalkers will literally stop at nothing to regain their "lost possession" -- their partner -- and in so doing, regain their lost self-esteem.

Just as with most domestic violence cases, stalkers are the most dangerous when they are first deprived of their source of power and self-esteem; in other words, the time when their victims determine to physically remove themselves from the offender's presence on a permanent basis by leaving the relationship.

Indeed, stalking cases which emerge from domestic violence situations constitute the most common and potentially lethal class of stalking cases. Domestic violence victims who leave an abusive relationship run a 75 percent (75%) higher risk of being murdered by their partners.

Stalking behavior is as diverse as the stalkers themselves. Yet behavioral experts are beginning to identify patterns in the cycle of violence displayed by simple obsession stalkers.

Stalking Behavior Patterns and Cycles:

Stalking behavior patterns closely mirror those common in many domestic violence cases. The pattern is usually triggered when the stalker's advances toward their victim is frustrated -- regardless of whether the stalker is seeking to establish a personal relationship or continue a previously established relationship contrary to the wishes of the victim.

The stalker may attempt to woo their victim into a relationship by sending flowers, candy and love letters, in an attempt to "prove their love." However, when the victim spurns their unwelcome advances, the stalker often turns to intimidation. Such attempts at intimidation often begin in the form of an unjustified, jealous and inappropriate intrusion into the victim's life. Often these contacts become more numerous and intrusive over time, until such collective conduct becomes a persistent pattern of harassment. Many times, harassing behavior escalates to threatening behavior. Such threats may be direct or indirect and communicated explicitly or implicitly by the stalker's conduct. Unfortunately, cases that reach this level of seriousness too often end in violence and/or murder.

Stalkers, unable to establish or re-establish a relationship of power and control over their victims, turn to violence as a means of reasserting their domination over the victim. In some cases, offenders are even willing to kill their victims and themselves in a last, desperate attempt to assert their domination over the victim.

The evolution of the stalker's thought pattern progresses from, "If I can just prove to you how much I love you," to "I can make you love me," to "If I can't have you, nobody else will."

While this progression in behavior is common, no stalking case is completely predictable. Some stalkers may never escalate past the first stage. Others jump from the first stage to the last stage with little warning. Still others regress to previous stages before advancing to the next. It is not uncommon to see stalkers intersperse episodes of threats and violence with flowers and love letters.

As difficult as it is to predict what a stalker might do, it is at least as difficult to predict when he might do it. A few stalkers will progress to later stages in only a few weeks or even days. In other cases, stalkers who have engaged in some of the most serious stalking behaviors may go months or even years without attempting a subsequent contact.

It is this unpredictability that makes developing an effective response strategy so difficult in any particular stalking case.

So... Can I get your number? ;-)

Wanna Act Discreet? The Final Appeal... (Philippine Setting)

I get dismayed when gay guys declare on their profiles that they want and prefer sex eye balls that are as DISCREET like them as well. FUCK!!! My blood pressure is rising since most of them are SOOOOO STUPID!

Let's take a look at the definition of the word discreet:

Pronunciation: \dis-ˈkrēt, ˈdis-ˌ\
Function: adjective
Etymology: Middle English, from Latin discretus

1.  : constituting a separate entity : individually distinct

2.  : consisting of distinct or unconnected elements : noncontinuous


FOR THE LAST TIME HERE ARE TIPS FOR YOU HARD HEADED GAY GUYS...

DO NOT...

1. Post pictures that you appear so girlie, but then again, I can see and sense from the picture alone if you're lying on your poses. Your eyebrows can't lie, your outfits can't lie, your choice of colors can't lie, your hair colors can't lie, your accessories can't lie, your choice of words can't lie, your poses can't lie. YOU STILL LOOK SO BAKLA!

2. Pretend that you are indeed viewed as very discreet even if you are posed half-naked showing your abs or your rippling muscles. With just one look at your pictures I can really tell that you are a screaming fag when I see you in person!

3. Declare that you are indeed discreet since the tasting of the pudding is in the eating. Get ready to be rejected abruptly in case.

4. Post pictures taken 5 years or 10  years ago. This is just an act of foolishness that will just bounce back to you.

5. Write on your profiles things that are incongruent with your claims. You want a discreet sex partner yet the colors of your profile are ranging from pastels to rainbows.

6. Use your main profile pic as if you are a Greek god when it's not you. Pretenders are automatically cursed.

7. Claim that you are handsome nor cute when in FACT YOU AREN'T!

8. Try hard selling yourself when you are not physically marketable. I appreciate honest and humble guys without lifting their own rusted chairs, yet full of surprises once you get to know them. 

9. Post on your profile things that you do not know or capable just to impress other people.

10. LIE, BE A POSER, PRETEND. So what if your body ain't buff? Or you have an average look? BE THE REAL YOU AS LONG AS YOU HAVE A GOOD HEART AND COMPASSIONATE. BUT STILL WAG KA KASI MASYADONG BADING NA BADING, sincè here in the Philippines, the effeminates don't have much room for the so-called discreet preferences of gay guys in here. Kapag halata ka you have less chances of winning a dick. The effems of the Philippines are usually attractive for foreigners. But still, those who are trying hard to be discreet cannot pass rigid eyes like mine! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. EVEN ON PROFILE PICS!